What they want (in football) in 2024 – 01/01/2024 – Sandro Macedo

This scribe would humbly like to warn the unsuspecting that the year that has just begun will take longer to end (the leap year curse).

Having said this extremely important information, let’s remember that 2024 is also an Olympic year, with medals distributed in bulk in Paris — some in Tahiti. In our beloved Breton sport, or not, the Asian and African Cups start next week, the tournaments most hated by the clubs in the Breton Premier League, who will lose Salah, Son, Endo, Wissa, Onana, etc. for a few weeks.

In Brazil, January is the month of the main championship of the season, the Copa São Paulo de Futebol Juniores. It could be the last chance to see stars from your favorite team before they are sold to Europe (the Corinthians, to Zenit).

Still in the mood for New Year’s resolutions, see what teams and stars want for 2024, always remembering that this column is 90% perspiration and 10% irony.

Abel Ferreira: being invited to manage the Brazilian team… and refusing. And may 2024 be conditioned again.

Neymar: continue with teams that allow him paid vacation in July, December (with cruise) and January. Boxing Day is for muggles.

Neymar’s father: a proposal for his son to play in New Zealand, continuing the brilliant plan of making Júnior conquer the world — Auckland City would certainly be on another level if they had Neymar in their medical department.

Carlo Ancelotti: take a vacation in Brazil and work in Madrid.

Ednaldo Rodrigues: two tickets to “Wonka” (needs to learn how to manage a chocolate factory).

Tite: tell the truth, only the truth, nothing but the truth.

Lil Gabi: transforming into Gabigol again… even if it’s just one more year (ah, performances in Carioquinha don’t count).

Fernando Diniz: continue with two businesses open to win two turkeys for Christmas.

Botafogo: starting to lose 4-0, which hurts less — 4-3 is very painful. And wash the mat with running water and coarse salt.

Corinthians: two defenders, two left-backs, two right-backs, two midfielders and two attackers (but who score goals) — it’s a good idea to buy two of each, so you can sell one to Zenit.

Flamengo fans: let the managers build a team, not a pot, to match the billion-dollar budget. All Flamengo’s rivals: may Rodolfo Landim and Marcos Braz do everything as brilliantly as they did in 2023.

Palmeiras: let the fans learn to lose (you can’t go into crisis and start spraying everything just for one semester without a title).

John Textor: placing Crystal Palace players in the Brazilian Championship and Botafogo players in the Premier League. Who knows, maybe it will work.

Santos: have the results of Palmeiras in 2023. To do this, they are investing in Corinthians in 2023 (strange).

São Paulo: an encore from last year is already good (this scribe apologizes for not resisting the pun. We will have about 15 more of these throughout the year).

Seu Panini: make at least one Brazilian album that doesn’t seem ridiculous two weeks after its release (a toast to the standout Pedro Raul).

Luxembourg, Vanderlei: a microwave to heat pasta and a house with just one bathroom, so as not to create doubts.

This scribe’s wish: for a Brazilian Series A team to sign Luxemburgo, Vanderlei. I miss. There, i said it.

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