Suicide, secret sale of land and loan: the drama of the victims of the virtual dating scam

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The scam is known as ‘romance scammer’ or virtual sentimental fraud. Fake profiles make victims fall in love, and then ask for money. In addition to material losses, 14% of people also fall into depression. The scam is known as ‘romance scammer’ or virtual sentimental fraud Max Francioli A single mother decides to log into Facebook, and soon receives a friend invitation from a person she doesn’t know personally. The relationship deepens, promises of love are made until the supposed boyfriend asks to borrow money to be able to send a gift from another country, then disappears from the social network. This is the story of Maria*, but also of thousands of people who fall for the scam known as “romance scammer” or virtual sentimental fraud. In it, groups of fraudsters pretend to be foreigners in high positions, in the most common case, United States military personnel. After establishing what would be a romance, the criminal begins to ask his victims for money. Scam affects 4 in 10 women; understand why this still happens This crime focuses on women between 40 and 70 years old, regardless of social class or whether they are married, explains Glauce Lima, scammer hunter and founder of the GKScanOnline Institute, which supports victims of cybercrime. She started looking for criminals online after a friend fell victim to the scam in 2011. In 1 year, she managed to remove 1,600 fake social media profiles and in 2013 managed to arrest the scammer who robbed her friend, who lived in Nigeria, with the police. local. The relationship takes place entirely over the internet and, currently, even video calls are made using deepfake, a technology that allows a person’s face to be shown in photos or videos altered with the help of artificial intelligence (AI). Furthermore, there is also another type of victim: the real owner of the photo used by these profiles, such as speaker Kau Mascarenhas, who receives messages on his networks accusing him of stealing money. There are three factors that can make a person a victim of this scam, according to experts interviewed: Passion: leaves the person in a state similar to hypnotism; Psychological disorder: eretomania, one of the forms of delusion, causes the person to believe that someone with great social differences will fall in love with them, but there will be some conspiracy that the partner needs to be saved; Social custom: it is considered normal for a woman to hand over control of her assets to her partner. Discover these stories below. The gift that never arrived For rural producer Maria, 50 years old, it all started with a simple friend request on Facebook in 2016, the year in which she also lost a sister and her father. It didn’t take long for the first “I love you” to be exchanged, followed by the request for money, which came about a month after the conversations began. “He said a lot of beautiful things,” she reports. “I was desperate and thought it was true. Because we, without experience of anything, believe, right,” she says. The scam was carried out in a classic way: her boyfriend claimed that he was a US soldier, that he was at war and that he needed money. The photos published by the scammer were, in fact, of Dragan Šutanovac, a Serbian politician and the country’s former Defense Minister. Fake profile used a photo of Dragan Šutanovac, a politician from Serbia. Reproduction Facebook “Do you know what he invented? There was so much luggage that they ordered to arrive first [que o namorado], for us to store our luggage, suitcase of money, jewelry, documents”, he remembers. The jewelry would be gifts for her. According to the scammer, the luggage had been stuck at customs, requiring a fee to be paid. When Maria explained that she didn’t have an airport in her city to pick up, he gave her a bank account number and said that some friends would take the suitcase to her. The amount required was R$12 thousand. The rural producer took out a loan from the bank in 2016, which she must pay back by 2025. A week after sending proof of payment, Maria was blocked by her boyfriend. The suitcase never arrived. Three months later, a profile with the same photo, but a different name, sent a message again, asking for more money, but she claims not to have sent it. Maria says that, to this day, similar profiles send her messages and even use emotional blackmail. “He comes back and asks me, ‘What’s going on that you’re not answering me? Don’t you love me anymore?’”, he narrates. Scammer asks Maria for money saying he will buy a ticket to meet her Personal archive The rural producer confesses that she was in love, but part of the feeling, today, was transferred to the real owner of the photo and she dreams of one day meeting him. This happens to victims of this type of scam, because they project an attachment to the images, in relation to the loving conversations they had, as if, in some way, the feeling could be true, explains Desiree Hamuche Montes, founder of the victim support initiative “It was a scam, not love”. Since she began to be approached by criminals, Maria has been unable to interact with other people. She has been diagnosed with depression and anxiety and takes medication. Deep depression Just like Maria, 17% of victims give up on the websites of relationships and 12% completely give up looking for someone, shows research obtained exclusively by g1 from the organization “Era Golpe, Não Amor”, a non-profit hub to support women victims of financial scams in romantic relationships. The initiative is from the communications agency Fresh PR, in partnership with the company Hibou, specialized in research and market insights, the Brazilian Association of EMDR (name of the therapy that uses double stimulation to help patients process difficult memories) and Kickante, with support from the Center for Assistance to Victims of Violence (NAVV) of the Public Ministry of São Paulo. 2,036 women from across the country were interviewed, considering the proportional division of race, age and social class, through virtual forms in March 2023. The study has a 2.2% margin of error and a 95% confidence interval. In addition to losing money and property, 14% of “romance scammer” victims fall into depression, the study says. After the farmer understood that she had fallen for a scam, she discovered in March 2022 that a colleague from her city was being victimized by the same profile. She tried to warn her friend, but she didn’t believe her. The criminal even asked his friend to pay debts of R$40,000. She took out a loan and sent the amount. When the scammer also started to ignore it, she realized it was a scam. “And then this girl became so desperate, she sank into depression.” The victim committed suicide in July 2022. Only 12% of victims seek psychological help after suffering a relationship scam on the internet, the survey shows. Virtual dating scam: understand in the video what it is and why people still fall for it: Virtual dating scam: understand what it is and why people still fall for it ‘There’s no way to suspect it’s a scam’ Isabela*, 54 years old , is married, but was victimized by the same group of criminals about 4 years ago and still faces depression today because of the scam. They also used photos of Šutanovac. The fake military man approached her saying that she was raising funds to help American soldiers at war. He also tried to carry out the suitcase scam, requesting R$5,000, which Isabela did not have. Even after she denied it, the criminals did not give up on her and the relationship continued until the criminal sent nude photos and made video calls. For Isabela, the videos seemed real and she believes that the man in the photo is the same man she was talking to. He even said that he wanted her to leave her family to be together. Despite denying that she would do this, Isabela went so far as to sell land that she inherited from her mother. The property was valued at R$50,000, but she agreed to sell it for R$20,000 because of the rush. When she went to deposit the money into the criminal’s account, her manager stopped her. To this day, her husband does not know that she sold the land. “Look, I fell in love with him. […] We are needy, it is a difficult time. And, suddenly, a different person appears, who you have no way of suspecting is this, because he is a person who dresses well, grooms himself well, speaks well. He would call me on video and show his face”, he explains. Also read: Virtual rape: abusers use fake photos to blackmail the victim; understand the crime ‘He wanted to annihilate me alive’: find out what revenge porn is and get to know stories of victims Second victim: owner of the photo “I was so scared by this”, says speaker and therapist Kau Mascarenhas. He discovered that his photo was being used in scams like those suffered by Isabela and Maria in August 2020, when a victim found his real profile and warned him. “It messed with my head, I didn’t even know it existed”, he says. Fake profile uses a photo of Kau Mascarenhas to carry out a “romance scammer” scam. Reproduction Mascarenhas has a factor that helps a lot the scammers: because he is a speaker, there is a lot of his material online, such as photos and videos. Therefore, it is possible to create montages so that victims believe they are talking to him even via video call. Today, he uses a technique to minimize this: he writes his name in small letters in the corner of the photo. When women zoom in, they discover that the profile they are chatting with is fake. He also avoids publishing photos of his personal life. “Even because a photo that is used a lot by criminals is one in which I am with my mother”, he says. So-called scammers use the photo to ask for money to treat the supposedly sick mother. Kau Mascarenhas has his photos used by criminals in a virtual embezzlement scam. Personal file He also decided to file a police report to report the misuse of his image, but was informed at the police station that there was little that could be done, as it was a crime on an international scale. The therapist deals daily with messages from victims, who are usually foreigners: “Some didn’t believe that I was also a victim, that I had my photos and videos stolen. Then they wrote very aggressive messages saying: ‘You are perverse, you are a murderer, you are a criminal, how can you do this to me and the money I gave you? Give me back'”. There are also victims, like Maria, who transfer their love to his face. “I spent too much time talking to the victims. They wrote to me, told me their sad stories. It was very difficult to ignore these people’s pain. So, I started responding to those messages”, says Kau. “But they had my image associated with the romance they idealized, a romance with a person who isn’t me,” he adds. He was warned by support groups that this, in fact, harmed the victims’ healing process and today he only gives guidance on where they can get help. Romance scammer Luisa Rivas / Arte g1 Virtual dating scam: victims are deceived and lose money. g1 / art *The names Maria and Isabela are fictitious, to protect the victims. Also know: Was there a nude leak? Practice is a crime; find out how to gather evidence, report it and ask for its removal Brazil has at least 4 lawsuits per day for disclosing intimate images Find out how to protect yourself from other scams: Was there a nude leak? Practice is a crime; find out how to report Virtual rape: abusers use fake photos to blackmail victims ‘Deepfake live’: technology that changes faces and voices in video calls already exists in real life

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