What is ‘lagom’, the Swedish philosophy for the pursuit of happiness and balance – 7/16/2023 – Balance
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The Swedish philosophy of lagom invites you to enjoy life more in a balanced way. It’s doing what’s absolutely essential and knowing when to stop.
It is not surprising, therefore, that the term has been chosen, a few years ago, as the “word of fashion” by several international publications, such as Vogue and Elle magazines.
For writer and photographer Lola Akinmade Åkerström, who lives in Stockholm, the spirit of lagom is what truly defines the Scandinavian way of life.
“It’s not just a word, but the essence of what it means to be and live Swedish,” writes Åkerström in his book “Lagom: The Swedish Secret of Living Well”. ).
“It deeply permeates Sweden’s society and language, from work and family to home decor, food, care for the environment, finance and much more,” explained Åkerström in an interview with Forbes magazine.
“For me, lagom really means the best solution, not the perfect solution, to create balance in any context,” she added.
“I would dare say it is the root of the Swedish mentality.”
For psychologist Niels Eék, co-founder of the wellness app Remente, it’s natural that lagom is becoming popular among people around the world.
“On the one hand, we are exaggerated in our work habits, relationships and whims,” he says.
“On the other hand, we’re advised to limit ourselves by trying a new diet or a fad detox.”
“In a world of contrasts and contradictory advice, the lagom hits the spot: it allows people to have fun while staying healthy and happy at the same time,” he explains.
The origin of the word
Etymologically, the word lagom is an Old Norse form of the word “law”. It also means “group” in Swedish.
But culturally, its roots go back to the times of the Vikings, who gathered around the fire after a hard day’s work and shared horns filled with mead, a fermented drink made with honey.
Each person was expected to drink enough so that everyone else would also drink enough. And over the centuries this “laget om” (“sitting together”) was shortened to “lagom”.
The concept is difficult to translate because it changes meaning according to the situation and in different contexts.
It can mean “appropriate” in a social realm, “moderation” in food, “less is more” in interior decorating, “mindfulness” in well-being, “sustainability” in lifestyle, and “logic” in business.
But all this carries a connotation of ideal decision-making.
And, above all, it represents the permanent decision making that is best for you or for the group in which you find yourself.
“Think of lagom as an imaginary scale that always needs to be balanced,” Åkerström said.
“Too little tips the balance, and too much tips the balance. lagom tries to eliminate stress to keep the balance always balanced. Sustainable habits that can be maintained on a daily basis are the secret to maintaining that balance.”
Being lagom also means being moderate in personality, opinions and politics.
Swedes generally hate to disagree, even during a dinner debate.
It’s incredibly frustrating in other cultures, which consider boasting as a sign of commitment, showing that you really care about what’s being discussed.
When you say skratta lagom to children or lagom kul to teenagers, it doesn’t mean “laugh all the way” or “have a little fun” – it means “don’t laugh too much” or “don’t cross the line”.
Application in everyday life
If you follow the principle of doing everything in a balanced way, it is easy to understand how this philosophy works in different everyday situations.
Working too hard, for example, goes against the philosophy of lagom. So a simple way to apply the concept at work is to take regular breaks.
In Sweden, resting with a cup of coffee and, who knows, eating a sweet with co-workers even has a name: fika.
It is customary to take this break twice during the working day. This helps recalibrate the day so you don’t work too hard.
the mentality lagom also means planning and always seeking consensus, to minimize conflicts and discussions at work.
At home, lagom means reducing stress, from the understanding that everything that is not functional, nor has strong emotional value, is taking up space in the house.
The objective is to create a cozy and welcoming environment, only with objects that generate well-being or happiness because they bring back good memories, for example.
You must let go of what is unnecessary to avoid crowded houses.
The same goes for food. Lagom encourages healthy eating habits that you can comfortably maintain.
This means eating by adopting sustainable, ethical and local consumption, with fresh and seasonal products. And leftovers should be reused.
An example is the pyttipanna recipe, traditionally prepared with the remains of the last meals.
Likewise, lagom encourages conscious consumption, with a meticulous approach to the use of money, avoiding useless spending.
This doesn’t mean you should just save. In fact, the philosophy is that it’s better to spend money on something good and durable, like a quality piece of clothing, than something affordable and poorly made.
“I think the beauty of this way of life is that we can pick and choose the best parts to apply and combine with our own cultures,” says Åkerström.
“In my own life, for example, I’ve become a better listener by talking less and sharing only relevant information.”
“With regard to well-being, I learned to say ‘no’ more often and, more importantly, not to feel guilty about it,” she adds.
Each person has their ‘lagom’
Lagom is fascinating because it’s about a mindset – not just a specific set of actions to take.
Lagom wants us to find our own balance and happy moments in our lives to feel comfortable. There is no specific habit.
In short, each has its own lagom.
If we focus first on our needs and satisfy them as much as possible with the best possible quality, we will already be laying the groundwork for satisfaction in our lives.
As one person’s lagom is not exactly the same as another’s, a negative side of lagom can manifest itself within groups.
This causes people to conform to maintain harmony and not present their individual levels of lagom to the group, to avoid causing problems and resentment.
Lagom wants to take us to a space of individual satisfaction, while creating harmony within groups.
“Lagom teaches us to avoid excess and extreme limitation, which allows us to better understand what makes us happy and what works for our own unique mental well-being,” explains Eék.
According to him, “By adopting a lagom mindset, we teach ourselves how to avoid extreme moods or feelings.”
So if you go to Sweden and notice long stretches of silence and studied responses, it most likely has nothing to do with you – it’s just lagom at work.
This text was originally published here.
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