Does love hurt? Women tell defaults they took from ‘contatinhos’ and boyfriends

Does love hurt?  Women tell defaults they took from ‘contatinhos’ and boyfriends

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Gil do Vigor, from ‘BBB21’, and Thiago Godoy, Rico’s economist, give tips for you not to fall into traps and balance emotion and pocket money. This week’s Financial Education podcast tells the stories of three women who were unlucky in love and in their pockets and took defaults from ex-boyfriends and hookups. Listen below: To help not only our interviewees, but everyone who is going through something similar, we invited economists Gil do Vigor, who participated in “BBB21”, and Thiago Godoy, from Rico, to give financial tips – and even loving ones 😉 . Come read: Andréa Andréa is 31 years old and is a teacher. She lives and works in São Sebastião, on the coast of São Paulo. Now, he’s well and loving again, but he tells us about the loss he took last year with his ex-boyfriend: “I met a guy on Tinder. He told a sad story of how he was a single father, that his mother child abandoned his son, and she was crazy and bipolar. And she was living a great life there, earning a big salary, and he asked for a minimum pension for her. His job was home office, he had a website for advertisement of job and said he earned a thousand dollars from Google. We got to know each other, we got along well. And he told me that he had a car, the car was broken down and he needed BRL 5,000 to change the engine. I said ‘well, I have R$ 5,000, I’ll borrow it’. Then I went to several mechanics with him, a tinsmith, an electrical mechanic. In the end, I didn’t need to change the engine, but he fixed several things: sunroof, car stereo, changed the tires . Everything like that, going smoothly, pushing. And I was very involved in this relationship, I already knew his son, a child. the seven-year-old charmer. And I offered a psychologist for his son. In the end, he made the appointment and then said that the therapy was going to be for him and not for his son because the son was fine. So the people around me realized that the situation was strange, but I was blind. And there came a day when I had a social at my house and some friends of mine came. He was leaving with my car because his wasn’t ready yet and he was going to take his son away. And then a friend of mine left too, to go to a rave party. When it was 1 am, she sent me a message saying that my boy was there at this party with another girl. So, I tried to make a debt confession agreement to protect myself because I had already invested a lot of money in him, I had already invested in his website there. And he didn’t want to sign, he was very angry. He said several things, which was a laughable contract. And he broke up with me. And I was doing French, I didn’t want to say ‘I know you cheated on me’, but then he got into the loop of slamming me on WhatsApp, he wouldn’t stop. So I sent him the video and the picture my friend found of him with the other girl. Then he freaked out, then went into the apology loop and I just ignored it, stopped talking. After that, I filed a BO for emotional larceny. Probably nothing will come of it, this story has been going on for a little over a year now.” Marcela Casagrande Marcela Casagrande Personal archive Marcela Casagrande, known as Marchela, runs Lambisgoia Cast, a podcast to talk about the worst dates in the world. Here, she tells the only time that one of these encounters ended in loss: “My story began in Chapada dos Veadeiros with a kitten I met on a punctured trail. Who goes to the trail, huh? That’s where the drill starts. And then we kind of fell in love and spent a month talking. Him saying ‘come to Rio, come to Rio, come to Rio’. And off I went. He asked where I was going to stay, I said I was staying at an Airbnb for the weekend, but then I was going to my friend’s house. And then he said ‘no, close Airbnb during the week when we spend the whole week together’. I said ok. And then I paid, I don’t know, I think it was R$ 2,000 to stay for a week, I don’t remember exactly because it was like two years ago. We stayed one or two days. Then he went to his house saying he was going to come back. And he started to string me around, string me around, string me along. Three days went by, he didn’t come back and then he ended up saying that I was too independent for him because I paid for the Airbnb alone, because I went to Rio de Janeiro alone and he wasn’t used to such mature women. And then I had this loss of BRL 2,000 from Airbnb. But there’s also a tip, right? When you don’t know the person well, don’t take what the person says seriously. And he said he was going to stay at Airbnb because it was closer to his work, because he lived close to Barra and the apartment was over there in Ipanema, so I was going to stay with me and, in the end, I was left alone in a great disappointment in love. ” Thaís Moreira Thaís Moreira Personal archive Thaís Moreira is 27 years old and works with customer service and support in São José dos Campos, in the interior of São Paulo. from the school canteen. Here, she talks about her longest relationship: “It was a long relationship, so a lot of things happened, but I’ll tell you one specific one. This boyfriend of mine “needed” to move to another city to work closer to college. I had to put it in quotes because during college he never worked, he just really wanted to live in a city far away from me to do everything he couldn’t do with me here in my city, you know. And there were years of this process of him living in another city, people spending money to see each other and everything else without need, since he could stay here and get a job here like everyone else did, everyone worked here and studied in another city. But no, not him, he was golden rosemary, he needed it. And then like “ah, are we going to see each other this weekend?”. “Oh, I don’t know, I don’t have any money”. And then the idiot, wanting to be with her boyfriend, gave her boyfriend money to put gas on to go downstairs. So it was almost like an obligation like “for God’s sake, come stay with me. If you don’t have money, let me do it, but let’s stay together this weekend”. That was more or less it. But then we find out what? That he didn’t have the money to use with me, but the weekends he spent in the city where he was living, he went to bars, he went to neighboring cities, he went to parties. So he was always like that with a very active social life, very busy in this character he had that he was single, but not for his girlfriend. Meanwhile, I paid for food when he came here, I paid for gasoline, right? The rolês that we wanted to give here in the city I also banked. So for a long time, I was a mother there, right? I was a mother to my boyfriend. So, if we’re going to put it on paper here, I need to be compensated urgently because the blow was big.” Tips from the experts Based on the previous stories, we asked three questions to the interviewees: Can you lend money to a date or boyfriend? Gil does not recommend “First, don’t lend money. I think the basics of anyone who wants to be financially healthy is to save money, to have an emergency reserve to use. When do you put your income at risk? That’s for everyone: in an emergency or when you have a desire, for example, you need to travel for a job interview in another state and you don’t have money to buy a plane ticket. But any other situation, no. So, for boyfriends, husbands, and families, money is not loaned. If you have an emergency reserve, someone asks you for a loan and you manage to use up to 20% of the reserve, you can. So if I have a reserve of BRL 1,000, the maximum I can borrow is BRL 200. The person has to understand the following: if they are borrowing to maintain comfort, they will hardly be able to pay the loan. First, I will be losing that money that I could be investing. R$ 5 thousand invested in a CDB will yield what? 10% per annum, 9% per annum. So if you have R$5,000 and you take 10% a year, it’s R$500. So if you take your little money that could be earning and give it to someone, first you stopped making an income on it. And second, you put yourself at risk of not being able to recover that amount.” How to reconcile two very different incomes? Gil explains: “No one has to pay dinner for anyone, you have to share it. We are in the time of division. Relationship is luxury. So, you have to understand the following: to maintain a relationship, both need to be willing to make sacrifices. If one person earns less than the other, they can go to appointments that their wages can afford. You can make a cinema at home, there are so many series, so many programs that are free. So I think you need to be aware of this: living within the limits of your reality. So, if in a relationship, she has more than him, that doesn’t mean they won’t be in a relationship. But when he calls for something, and he knows his conditions, he needs to take her to activities within the reality he lives. And if they like each other, it won’t be a problem. Now if, once in her life, she knows he can’t and she says ‘no, you took me to that place this month, I went and I loved it. Now I want to go and I know you can’t afford it, so I’ll pay’, then they do this division, but it’s not possible to keep everything on the account of only one.” It’s worth spending a little more to see the contact ? Thiago gives the lyrics: “She bought a risk, right? I think it’s always worth looking at this possible risk and asking ‘well, is this Airbnb within my budget?’ I really like talking about goals and objectives because it turns out that, when we really identify that they are important and that they are a priority, we can program ourselves to meet these objectives and use our money later with what appears. For example: when a person is single, he is looking at his life, he has individual financial management, there is no other person to use that money, unless he is helping the family. But she will look at her goals. It’s easier, even, because she manages to plan financially. So I think it’s a matter of caution in life and especially with money. Because we can minimize the risk when we are a little more cautious. And it’s important not to go too far out of the budget we’ve established, to put a ceiling per month on leisure, travel, restaurants, cinema, clubbing, whatever.” Initial plugin text

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