Late adoption: couple adopt sister for 9-year-old daughter – 02/10/2023 – Equilíbrio

Since when they were dating, the issue of adoption has been present in the lives of psychomotor therapist Daniele Ribas Précoma Moro, 40, and communication and marketing manager Gabriel Moro, 39. She, since adolescence, said she wanted to adopt a child and he had also thought about it.

Years passed, the two got married and nine years ago they had their first daughter, Alice. With life stabilized, the family, who live in Colíder, in the north of Mato Grosso, felt that something was still missing. Although they were happy, the house was still not complete.

“Alice’s pregnancy was uneventful and uneventful. We could have had a second biological child, but our dream has always been to also have an adopted child”, says Daniele.

It was when, in 2019, Daniele and Gabriel decided to put their desire to adopt a child into practice and registered with the National Adoption and Reception System.

The couple’s idea was never to adopt a baby, but an older child. After going through the process that made the couple ready to adopt a child, the family was then able to select the characteristics of the desired child, such as age, skin color and gender, for example.

After completing all the documentation, they entered a waiting list that considers the order of arrival and preferences of each adopter.

“When we signed up, Alice was already 5 years old and we wanted a girl in a close age range, from 4 to 8 years old, so that the two could be friends and be very close. Besides, they could share a room and toys”, recalls Daniel.

Three years passed and the family was still on the waiting list. Alice grew up and her little sister never arrived. However, that situation changed last year after the couple proposed to adopt an even older child, up to 12 years old.

“During those three years we didn’t receive any call from the adoption system. Alice was already 8 years old and so we decided to also increase the age of the child we intended to adopt, even to try to increase the chances of having our second daughter”, says psychomotrician .

As older children belong to a less competitive age group, about five months later the family was selected to meet an 11-year-old girl named Gabrielly who lived in a shelter and was waiting in line for adoption.

Because they live in different cities, the first contacts were through photos. Then the video calls started. As ties grew closer, visits and trips on weekends were authorized. Until, in October 2022, Gabrielly gained a new home.

“It’s like a pregnancy, we go through different processes and when the day finally comes for us to receive this child at home, it’s an immense joy. Since we met Gabi, there was an identification and a huge love between all of us, no there was no way she wasn’t our second daughter”, says Daniele.

psychological follow-up

The mother also says that throughout the process – from registering in the adoption system to meeting the selected child for the first time – Alice was always present and always part of the whole context that includes adoption. Situations that made her accept her new older sister very well.

“They are great partners, they play together all the time and study at the same school. They ride their bikes, skate, run around the house, wherever one goes, the other goes along. “, he adds.

In addition, to deal with all the changes that the arrival of a new child in the home requires, the family insisted that the two children had psychological follow-up.

“Now, yes, our family is complete with our two daughters. We no longer remember what our lives were like before Gabi arrived”, he adds.

Late adoption in Brazil

Data from the National Adoption and Reception System show that last year 362 children over 12 years old were adopted in the country. The number represents 10% of the 3,608 adoptions registered in the period.

Currently, there are 2,085 children over 12 years old waiting for a new home, representing almost half of the children eligible for adoption, which are 4,227. On the other hand, those aged between 2 and 4 years represent almost 50% of those who gain a new family. A child is considered suitable for adoption when the entire process of removing him from the biological family is completed.

Still according to the National Adoption and Reception System, almost 33,000 (32,913) suitable applicants are in line to adopt a child in the country, a greater number than that of children living in shelters in the country, 31,256.

This account just doesn’t close because the vast majority of these adopters (26,490) are waiting for a child between 2 and 6 years old. And only 786 of them informed the system of their interest in children over 10 years old.

People interested in adopting a child go through a process of qualification for adoption with lectures and interviews with psychologists. If they are considered suitable, they will be part of a unified national registry, where data is crossed with the children who are in line waiting for a home.

“The wait to adopt a child in this age group of 2 to 4 years, which is the most sought after, can take up to 4 years. , because they are many and there are few adopters who accept older profiles”, says Noeli Reback, judge and president of the College of Childhood and Youth Coordinators of the Courts of Justice of Brazil.

To change this reality, the country’s Courts of Justice have carried out work to raise awareness and also to bring these children who need a home closer to society, such as sponsorship projects.

“These children need to be seen to be remembered. Furthermore, when we put them in contact with people, it changes a little the view that society has about them. We are making progress with regard to late adoption, but it is still shy” , adds the judge.

In the last four years, 13,966 were adopted in Brazil, of which 7,927 were between 2 and 8 years old and 4,964 were over 9 years old.

This text was originally published here